Saturday, December 29, 2007

Still Holding

The pickup is still parked in front of the house.




Tuesday, December 18, 2007


After Beavis' last outburst, he's been true to his word about still not moving his truck.

Y'know, this whole thing wouldn't be worth escalating if he didn't think the neighborhood was his personal junkyard. We don't park our vehicles in front of the neighbors' houses if at all possible...and we especially don't leave vehicles for MONTHS at a time in front of anyone else's house. Rude, obnoxious, spoiled behavior. Oh, and illegal, too.

His momma should've spanked him more as a child.

Monday, December 10, 2007

A Long Winter...

For the past five weeks or so, Beavis has laid claim to the street in front of our house with his dubiously-running former work pickup that leaves oil stains all over the place:

So the husband would resort to parking in front of Beavis' mommy and daddy's house whenever we didn't feel like stacking up our cars in the driveway. That annoyed Beavis, strangely enough. Apparently "what's good for the goose is good for the brain-dead pathetic gander who's so lame he has to live with his parents" isn't said in Beavis' household.

One night we came home to this. One of Beavis' dumb@$$ friends parked behind the husband's car to make it look like he bumped bumpers:

Upon closer inspection, we see that he's not:

So riding the line of legality is how it's gonna go? Fine by me.

He's still with the same BabyMama, but apparently things aren't going smoothly. There's a lot of in-the-middle-of-the-street verbal arguments, with a lot of her yelling, "WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!" as he stomps around, gets into his friend's car, and roars off into the night.

Kinda interesting, but it'd be better if he moved his damn truck.

We did a little research, and made a few phone calls last week.

Yesterday we had the chance to move my car in front of Beavis' mommy and daddy's house. In fact, Beavis saw us leave in the husband's car as he was leaving in his white peesacrap truck, and purposely drove around the block to see if I moved my car into his space. I didn't. It took willpower I didn't think I had, but I left sleeping scumbag dogs lie for the moment.

This morning was bright and sunny. The usual parking scene unfolded before me:

I put on my skates and went for a beach skate. As I strode by, I saw this:

Chalk marks on the front tire of Beavis' truck.


On the way back from my lovely beach skate I see this:

Chalk marks on the rear tire of Beavis' unmoved truck.

Not only that, but there's a lovely new accessory on Beavis' windshield:

Yep, a ticket!

Beavis usually stops by the ol' truck once every 7-10 days to start 'er up just for snicks and giggles...I can't wait to hear the cussing when he sees the ticket!

Edit: he found the ticket. He's not happy. He started the work truck up, then let it die. I stepped out onto the porch and had a seat to watch the show. His babymama walked around aimlessly. He stomped back and forth betwixt the work truck and peesachit truck cussing wildly. He sees me and growls, I'm gonna leave that truck there all month!

It's your wallet! I point out.

That lets loose a volley of cussing that I usually hear directed towards the babymama, who had fluttered back to Loser Homebase by this time. Real grownup! I reply. WHAT?!?!?! he yells. You heard me. I reply. More cussing ensues, and then he slams the peesachit truck door shut and sloooooowwwwwly drives off down the street. The husband is going to file a complaint with the cops, just to leave a paper trail.

Sunday, September 30, 2007


If you haven't already, go see Mike Judge's Idiocracy. Once you do, you'll fully understand our dear neighbor Beavis and our frustration with him, for it is that movie being played out in real life, right across the street from our house!

Here's the most pertinent part of the film for your viewing pleasure, so that you get what I'm talking about...btw, the language is NSFW:

Get it now? Beavis is Clevon.

He's on Babymama #3, as far as we know. He doesn't see the other two kids he has very often, as far as we know. An upstanding father figure, to be sure. Babymama #3 is feisty. She argues with Beavis a lot out in front of his mommy and daddy's house. Sometimes they're hauling their baby around while screaming. Sometimes she's just smoking while he's angrily throwing baby furniture in and out of his peesachit truck...yelling all the while. It's great to watch while I'm working. I get a great view from the window in the art room.

I've only seen Babymama #3 up close once. I shuddered. She's not old...late twenties, perhaps. However, she has a face that perfectly describes the saying, Rode Hard and Put Away Wet. Oof! I think she's definitely the type where she saw Beavis and said to herself, The Other Girls don't understand him. I'LL change him and make him the Perfect Man! She's failed, so far. And the frustration is beginning to show on her haggard, worn features. I can't wait to see how this all plays out.

To add to the fun, I saw something interesting a couple of weeks ago. I was working in the art room(damn freelance!), and I saw a blur out of the corner of my eye. It was one of Beavis' twerpy friends running up to their house, and he quickly ran inside. Then, a large SUV with four large Mexicans drove up and screeched to a stop and got out of the car and studied the front door to Beavis' parents' house. Beavis' daddy came outside. Beavis ran up. Babymama #3 fluttered behind. I don't know what the twerpy friend did, but the large Mexicans didn't like it, apparently. However, they were thwarted by Beavis and his daddy, and they eventually drove off. Beavis' twerpy friend ran out of the house five minutes later and jumped into Beavis' peesachit truck, where Babymama #3 and Beavis were already waiting for him, ready to go. They drove off.

End of story?

Well, the next day Beavis' peesachit truck had its windshield smashed out. Ooopsie! Apparently the large Mexicans don't like being told, No, you can't go in and smash the little twerp who just ran into that house over there. Ok, bye-bye! The large SUV and the large Mexicans therein haven't been back since, as far as I know. Unfortunately Beavis parked his truck in his parents' driveway so that I couldn't get a photo of the smashed windshield before he fixed it. Ah well, I'm sure it'll happen again, knowing him!

So depending on my photographic wherewithall, I hope to record more of Idiocracy in Action. It almost makes me want to have a kid to try to counteract this crap. Almost.

Too Long

Yes, I know it's been too long since I've updated the Entropy Project. Here's the latest...

Beavis' peesachit truck hasn't been in front of our house for a couple of months now. Occasionally one of his "friends" will park in front of our house, but it hasn't lasted long.

I think our success has to do with Beavis' latest Babymama more than our keeping one of our vehicles in front of our house. She's living with him and his mommy and daddy now. Hilarity ensues! I'm going to make a separate post about this next.

Anyway, back to the entropy! As a refresher, here's Beavis' worktruck and his sister's endlessly For Sale VW:

Aaaaand here they are, now:

See the difference? Wait, there is a difference:

The front wheel has been off of the worktruck for a couple of weeks now. I don't know what happened, as the truck hasn't moved in months. One day Beavis and a couple of his buddies took the wheel off, threw it into the back of the peesachit truck, and that's all I wrote.

Here's Beavis being a Social Butterfly a few months ago with some jerkwad in a Beetle in the middle of the street:

The jerkwad was constantly going up and down the street and stopping to talk to Beavis for a few weeks at a time. I think he's gone though. Again, I think the Babymama had something to do with it.

And last but certainly not least:

The ol' "Let's-park-in-front-of-the-fire-hydrant-because-we're-incredibly-stoopid" buddy. I don't know what the f#ck it is with this guy. He visits Beavis a lot. Sometimes he'll sleep in the cab of the truck if Beavis isn't home. Oh, and notice in this particular photo, the red car that's double-parked by the white pickup. Jeezus!

Sunday, July 15, 2007

It was toooooo quiet...

Beavis was relatively well-behaved for a few months there, but all good things must come to an end.

I came home from derby practice to find his latest girlthing parking his truck in front of our garbage cans. WTF!??!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!?!???!?!?!

This has happened before, and last time the sight of me coming out with a camera made Beavis move the truck promptly. Tonight, the girlthing came out of the truck and yelled to him, "What are they doing?! They're taking pictures!!" To which our potential Rhodes scholar wittily replied, "That's what they do." The girlthing then turned to me and said, "What are you taking pictures of?" to which I replied, "Of your sh!tty parking job, honey." Beavis then yelled something about making money off the photo. Oh yeah, dude, like you're worth a plugged nickel...dream on, silly dreamer.

The husband said to me, "Why are you starting up with them?" which baffles me, since I don't park my crapacious vehicles in front of anyone else's house or garbage cans like an @$$hole.

Ah well...enjoy the photos...this is what stupidity looks like:

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Another Car to Annoy

Yesterday morning brought us this sight:

The white car parked in front of our house belongs/ed to Beavis' sister. She left it with her mommy and daddy when she moved out and somehow managed to get a BMW. Also white, btw. I don't know what it is with that family and white cars, but then again, I guess it makes a nice juxtaposition to our black cars.

Anyway, Lil' Sis has her car for sale. For the past year and a half. Yeah, she got out of the house and into her Beemer almost two freakin' years ago. The old car was sitting down the street in front of some other neighbor's house for close to six months without moving at all(sound familiar?), but Beavis moved it onto their lawn earlier this week, washed and waxed it, and parked it in front of our house. Since there's a handy sign in the window stating that the car is for sale with a phone # listed, I'm going to see if I can't help this sloooowwwwwwwwww process along.

Here is the promised pic of Beavis' fine parking job in front of the fire hydrant next door to our house. Putz!

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Mainly Quiet on the Western Front...

...for now.

Ever since Beavis saw me taking photos of his obnoxiousness, he's been keeping said obnoxiousness on the downlow. Here are a couple of examples of what he does on Trash Day.

Basically he'll park his peesachit truck so that no one else can park in front of the house for a few hours. So far he'll move said peesachit before nightfall.

I also have a photo of Beavis' truck parked in front of the fire hydrant next door. I gotta dig that up and post it. He and his @$$hole friends have a really annoying habit of parking in front of said fire hydrant. Jeezus, there isn't a shortage of parking on the damn street, does it really affect their wittle footsies if they park 5o feet farther away?